Who Are You Beyond the Roles You Play?

By Megan McDonough

I found a photo of myself from my college graduation—a moment brimming with promise as I stepped into the world of nuclear medicine and healthcare. At that time, my identity was tightly intertwined with my aspirations: a healthcare professional eager to make an impact.

Fast forward a few decades, and the roles I’ve inhabited since are numerous: CEO, yoga teacher, writer, sales manager, mother, and friend. Each has brought its own challenges, lessons, and opportunities. But none has fully defined me.

Recently, I reconnected with a former boss from DuPont. We reflected on the $300 million strategic alliance we managed together and the many roles we’ve stepped into since then. When I asked Bill about his favorite role today, he answered, “Grandfather.”

His response reminded me of a truth we often overlook: roles evolve. They are inherently temporary, shaped by circumstances, and eventually left behind.

The Fluid Nature of Identity

In her book Act Like a Leader, Think Like a Leader, Herminia Ibarra argues that our identities are not fixed; they are shaped and reshaped by our actions. She writes, “Change happens from the outside in, not from the inside out.” In other words, we don’t wait to fully feel like a leader before stepping into a leadership role—we begin by acting the part. Through this process, our actions inform and expand our sense of self.

When we attach ourselves too rigidly to a specific role or identity, we risk stagnation. By contrast, when we view roles as fluid, we open ourselves to reinvention. Ibarra calls this outsight, or the ability to see ourselves differently by experimenting with new ways of being and doing.

A Deeper Foundation

But what happens when we’re between roles, or when a cherished identity is stripped away? This is where the question “Who are you beyond the roles you play?” takes on its greatest importance.

If we tether our self-worth exclusively to the roles we inhabit, their eventual absence can leave us untethered. By grounding ourselves in something deeper—a core sense of self that exists beyond the titles—we cultivate resilience. This inner grounding allows us to adapt gracefully to life’s inevitable transitions.

Leadership Through Action

For leaders, this concept is particularly poignant. Leadership emerges when we bring our whole selves—not just our titles—to the table. By aligning our actions with our evolving identities, we not only grow personally but inspire others to do the same.

Consider this: Are you stuck in a role because it feels safe? Or are you experimenting with new behaviors, learning from those around you, and expanding your leadership repertoire? As Ibarra suggests, the key to growth is action. When we lean into new challenges, we broaden the boundaries of who we are and what we can become.

Living Beyond the Roles

As I sat with my former boss, reflecting on the many roles we’ve played, I was reminded of how dynamic our lives are. Each role—a stepping stone. Each transition—an opportunity.

The question is not just “Who are you beyond the roles you play?” but also, “What new roles might you step into next?”

Letting go of rigid definitions of who we are opens up space for what’s possible. Whether you’re leading a team, navigating a career pivot, or simply reflecting on your life’s direction, remember: identity isn’t something you discover—it’s something you create.

By stepping into the roles we aspire to, we align our actions with our deeper sense of self—and the possibilities are endless.